Review: Hatsune Miku: Project Diva X

YAAAAAAASSSSS KAWAII KWEEN!!!

The kawaii queen and her Vocaloid cronies are back to pleasure your earlobes with their magical robo-voices for the first time on PlayStation 4, and the third time on PlayStation Vita. That’s right, the PS4 finally has an exclusive music and rhythm game that doesn’t suck, and it has tweens in swimsuits, which will make someone happy for sure.

If you’ve not jumped on the Vocaloid bandwagon, now is a great time to start, that way when Hatsune Miku becomes official queen of the world you’re ready to bow and kiss her digital toes while complimenting her smash hits. Plus, this is probably the best music game on PS4, so you can’t go wrong there.

Read the full review here.

Preview: Loot Rascals is an approachable roguelike in a colorful shell

What if I told you there is this game called Loot Rascals made by some of the people who made Hohokum, and featured art by the artists behind Adventure Time and Alphabear? Well I’m telling you now, because Rascals is an extremely colorful roguelike that’s easy to dig into.

Long story short, you’re a space traveler, and your spaceship crashes after a moon shows up out of nowhere moments after your teapot-headed robot buddy malfunctions due to what I can only assume is some kind of demon. On the surface of this moon you run into many zany creatures that mostly intend to kill you. Why? That isn’t quite clear yet, nor is what the end game is if there is one.

Read my full preview here.

Review: Uno

No voice chat, no video chat, no dicks, NO SELL!

Uno on Xbox 360 was a magical wasteland filled with strangers chatting it up on their Xbox Live Vision Camera, sometimes with their dicks out. As a man who is known to enjoy dicks from time to time, I quite liked that. Sure, sometimes you’d see a dick or two that you’d rather not, and sometimes someone would be wearing a Nazi or KKK uniform, but most of the time it was just chill people being social.

Ubisoft decided it would be a great idea to make a new Uno and hype it up as having voice and video chat, playing off the nostalgia of Xbox 360 owners. Guess what? Somehow Ubisoft managed to completely fuck it up.

Read my full review here.

Introducing The Gameographers – A Porn Game Podcast

Hello lovely readers and soon to be listeners. I’d like to introduce you to a brand new podcast you didn’t even know you wanted till now.

The Gameographers is a porn game podcast where myself, Alissa McAloon (also of Dtoid), and lovely UK bloke George Johnson (from Indie Haven) discuss a new porn game or games each week. This past week we played the “classic” porn RPG adventure known as Corruption of Champions, a game that Alissa says is one of her favorite games ever. In it you go through a demonic portal to a horny and hellish demon world and quest to save your town, but you just might lose all your virginities on the way.

It should go without saying the content of this podcast is very NSFW and basically every trigger warning you could think of applies including sexual violence.

There are a variety of ways to give our first episode a listen choose your favorite below (iTunes coming as soon as possible, might be a few days). For your convenience, it has also been uploaded to PornHub.

If you have any suggestions, comments, or questions please let us know! I think next week we will be fielding questions. Also, episode 2 is most likely going to be Breeding Season if you’d like to play, it is free!

 

Review: Batman – The Telltale Series: Episode 1 Realm of Shadows

Bruce Wayne has always been the best part of Batman

I’ve never been big into superhero movies, as they mostly focus on action and special effects, forgetting that the characters in tight suits should have, you know, emotions. The character building segments are always better than the fights in between, just like professional wrestling.

If you’re a Bruce Wayne fan, you’re in luck, as it seems like the developers at Telltale know this. All the best parts of this first episode happen outside of the suit.

Starting out, Batman slowly enters the scene as fitting music plays (though it is no Danny Elfman composition) and then there is a series of what appear to be quick time events, which have been welcome additions to video games exactly zero times.

Read my first review for Zam here!

Review: Overcooked

Have you ever wanted to be on Hell’s Kitchen? Well, look no further than the couch cooperation (or competitive) cooking game Overcooked, as it has everything but Chef Gordon Ramsay. Heck, it even includes a button to swear—though no foul language is actually uttered but instead comes out in symbols much like the classic Q-bert.

If you’ve got friends that actually come over to your house, then Overcookedwill be a blast. However, playing alone is both dull and difficult. You see, when playing with multiple people you can easily split up the tasks, as the entire game revolves around chopping, frying, and serving food and washing plates. When playing by yourself you’ve got to control two characters that you can swap between, or if you’re a talented multitasker you can play as both at the same time by splitting your controller in half, with the each side controlling a different character. I could not manage to do this, and eventually had to get my boyfriend to come help me complete the levels.

Read my full review here.

Review: Gal-Gun: Double Peace

An on-rails shooter goes on a date with an anime.

On-rails shooters have all but died, with only a handful releasing in the past decade perhaps due to the decline of the arcade. I absolutely adore the genre having grown up on the Area 51 and House of the Dead series, so my words should hold some weight when I say this is one of the deeper games in the genre; that is, if you can get over its ridiculous content, which is a big if unless you’re really into seeing child-like anime girls in their underwear (in which case, this is probably a must-buy for you).

Double Peace is a sequel to the original Gal-Gun (or Gal Gun or Gal*Gun) which was never localized outside of Japan. However, this game can be enjoyed without having played the original. The story of the original is explained at the start of the game, as this game takes place at the very same school, just with all new characters and enemies.

This game largely follows the same story: An angel/cupid in training is tasked with shooting the main character, Hodai, with a single love shot, but ends up blasting him with a lifetime’s worth by accident. This causes every female in his school to become lovestruck and obsessed with him. This also means that Hodai has only 24 hours to find his one true love, as he apparently can’t ever be shot with another arrow. Thus he has quite the dilemma on his hands.

Read my full review here.