Review: Attack on Titan

Most of our readers have probably heard of Attack on Titan at least once by now, but in case you’ve been living under a rock it’s a popular manga-turned-anime that follows the last remnants of humanity living in a city surrounded by walls to protect them from an outside world has been overrun by giant nude (but lacking genitalia) giants. With this release, players get to experience that as a game. Dynasty Warriors developerOmega Force finally brings the franchise to the PC and consoles, and while it is easily the best gamified iteration yet, it suffers many of the same issues as the previously released 3DS game based on the series.

Attack on Titan is one of those franchises that sounds like it would be great as a video gamebut if you stop to think about it, that isn’t the case. A majority of the anime has only one of two things happening: characters talking or having long drawn out introspectives, or killing titans. The actual killing of titans almost always plays out the same way. Characters use their specialized gear to zip through the sky and then slice the back of titans’ necks to kill them—rinse, repeat. While this game captures all that, the fighting of titans is so simple and repetitive that it becomes a real bore after just a few missions.

Read my full review here.

Review: The King of Fighters XIV

Unlike other recently released fight games (looking at you Street Fighter), The King of Fighters XIV manages to release as a full-fledged product with all the bells and whistles one would expect when buying a fighting game. In this package, you’ll find 50 characters to choose from each with unique play styles and moves, a story mode with 3D animated cut scenes, various multiplayer modes, training, and some challenge modes. While it isn’t perfect, it makes other fighting games on the market look like rip-offs with their lack of content and gross amounts of DLC.

This is the first time that a core King of Fighters game has been fully rendered in 3D (matches still play out on a 2D playing field like the other games in the series), though the graphics aren’t anything to write home about. By comparison to Street Fighter, they practically look last generation. Characters movements, animations, and stage backgrounds just aren’t as interesting or eye-catching, but that doesn’t mean this isn’t a solid fighter.

Read my full review here.

The King of Fighters XIV (PS4) Review 11

Review: Metroid Prime: Federation Force

What I’m about to say may shock you, but Metroid Prime: Federation Force is the best FPS for the Nintendo 3DS, and perhaps one of my favourite FPSs of all time. If you’re a fan of the Metroid series, there is plenty to see, including Samus, who shows up in various cutscenes. If you’re not, you’re still in for a treat, especially if you have friends to play with.

Anyone who has read anything about this game knows that many fans of the series weren’t happy with its announcement, as they had anticipated that Nintendo would reveal a new “proper” Metroid platformer of the sort that they had been dreaming of. After the announcement, there was mass down-voting of trailers, with people complaining that the game was ugly and that they hated the chibi art style.There was even a petition to get the game canceled. Were those people justified in their concerns and behaviors?

Read my full review here.

Impressions: The Elder Scrolls Legends beta

The first time I played The Elder Scrolls Legends was at PAX East this year, at which time I called it “a brown, clunky, cash-in” and while must admit that I do feel a bit warmer towards it now that I’ve been playing the beta, I stand by those words.

Elder Scrolls Legends suffers from what most Bethesda games suffer from: it lacks personality while having decent gameplay. When compared side-by-side to Blizzard’s Hearthstone, a game from which it takes many of its mechanics (perhaps those are from Magic: The Gathering, I don’t know), it just looks so lifeless. The one and only playing field is just a dull brown scroll, with most of the screen being similar shades of brown. The cards themselves have decent artwork, but the colours tend to be a bit muted. Worst of all this game features awful voice acting—which seems to be a Bethesda staple at this point.

Read my full impressions here.

Review: Shiren the Wanderer: The Tower of Fortune and the Dice of Fate

Have you ever heard of Shiren the Wanderer? I hadn’t until this game, but apparently, this is the fifth game in the series and a spinoff of the Mystery Dungeon games. I had never played any game in the Mystery Dungeon series, not even the cutePokemon ones, as I’d heard they were rather brutal JRGP dungeon crawlers that took lots of time to learn. I heard correctly.

First, the good, Shiren’s retro-like graphics practically pop off the screen, especially on the original vita’s OLED screen. If you like 16-bit or early PlayStation 1 JRPG pixel graphics, you’ll be quite pleased here, aside from the atrocious character portraits that display whenever characters talk – these look like a child drew them. The musical score is easy on the ears, and the characters are likable, such as your sidekick, who is a talking mongoose, or a girl wearing a panda onesie who offers to join you on your journey – for a price. Shiren is also on the Vita, which is a plus for anyone who owns the Vita, since it has so few games released for it these days.

Read my full review here.

Review: Hatsune Miku: Project Diva X

YAAAAAAASSSSS KAWAII KWEEN!!!

The kawaii queen and her Vocaloid cronies are back to pleasure your earlobes with their magical robo-voices for the first time on PlayStation 4, and the third time on PlayStation Vita. That’s right, the PS4 finally has an exclusive music and rhythm game that doesn’t suck, and it has tweens in swimsuits, which will make someone happy for sure.

If you’ve not jumped on the Vocaloid bandwagon, now is a great time to start, that way when Hatsune Miku becomes official queen of the world you’re ready to bow and kiss her digital toes while complimenting her smash hits. Plus, this is probably the best music game on PS4, so you can’t go wrong there.

Read the full review here.

Preview: Loot Rascals is an approachable roguelike in a colorful shell

What if I told you there is this game called Loot Rascals made by some of the people who made Hohokum, and featured art by the artists behind Adventure Time and Alphabear? Well I’m telling you now, because Rascals is an extremely colorful roguelike that’s easy to dig into.

Long story short, you’re a space traveler, and your spaceship crashes after a moon shows up out of nowhere moments after your teapot-headed robot buddy malfunctions due to what I can only assume is some kind of demon. On the surface of this moon you run into many zany creatures that mostly intend to kill you. Why? That isn’t quite clear yet, nor is what the end game is if there is one.

Read my full preview here.

Review: Uno

No voice chat, no video chat, no dicks, NO SELL!

Uno on Xbox 360 was a magical wasteland filled with strangers chatting it up on their Xbox Live Vision Camera, sometimes with their dicks out. As a man who is known to enjoy dicks from time to time, I quite liked that. Sure, sometimes you’d see a dick or two that you’d rather not, and sometimes someone would be wearing a Nazi or KKK uniform, but most of the time it was just chill people being social.

Ubisoft decided it would be a great idea to make a new Uno and hype it up as having voice and video chat, playing off the nostalgia of Xbox 360 owners. Guess what? Somehow Ubisoft managed to completely fuck it up.

Read my full review here.